Serendipity
by Meatball42
Summary: I considered 'The Flotsam and Jetsam of My Mind,' but that's a bit cheesy. Various Tochwood shorts of varying rating and genre. Latest: Ianto is hiding something, Jack is lonely, and Christmas doesn't turn out as they'd planned.
1. Serendipity

Title: Serendipity

Rating: G

Summary: "We have arrived for the birthday extravaganza of Duke Ianto the Suited of Torchwood!"

Author's Note: Written for the comment fic party over on Livejournal's tw-classic in celebration of our favorite Teaboy's birthday. Long live Ianto!

[*]

It wasn't the appearance of three rather rotund, hairy, orange aliens at his flat on his birthday that Ianto had trouble accepting, per se, as much as their insistence that they had a right to be there.

"We have arrived for the birthday extravaganza of Duke Ianto the Suited of Torchwood," announced the shortest and roundest of the three, who seemed to be the leader, upon forcing their way into Ianto's living room.

"I'm afraid I hadn't scheduled a birthday extravaganza," Ianto tried to tell them after he managed to drag his chin up from the floor.

"You _are_ Ianto Jones, are you not?" asked one of the other orange creatures. This one sounded male, English and snobby.

"Well, yes," Ianto began.

"And this _is_ August nineteenth, twenty-twenty-four, is it not?" continued the last orange creature. This one sounded female, English and snobby.

"I'm afraid it's August nineteenth, twenty-eleven."

Ianto waited for the trio to confer, wondering if he should be sneaking his mobile out to call Jack. He decided he could deal with the unexpected guests without calling in the team on his day off.

"I apologize for our miscalculation," the leader said politely. "But- we don't have enough fuel to make it to the correct date _and _return home, so what should we do with our present?"

"Present?" Ianto inquired.

"Indeed. A year's supply of the finest coffee beans that can be found in the Andromeda system."

"A year's supply, you said?" Ianto mused. "Which way to your ship?"


	2. Family Eccentricity

Title: Family Eccentricity

Rating: G

Summary: Gwen's mother told her all the women in their family had visions.

Author's Note: I loved the Advent Challenge, and I meant to continue writing drabbles, but... school. Yeah. So here's to trying. Written for the LiveJournal community tw100 for the prompt 'Dragons.'

[*]

That day was not the first time Gwen had seen a Weevil. They were constant visitors in her dreams, along with shrieking blue ghosts, disembodied voices speaking of unimaginable worlds and death- so much death.

Gwen was used to the dreams. Her mother told her that all the women in their family had them, and as a child Gwen imagined that she was a sorceress or a goddess.

When she joined Torchwood, Gwen began dreaming of a monster so huge and so evil that its shadow brought death, but she ignored them. That sort _had _tobe only nightmares. Right?


	3. Friendly Presence

Title: Friendly Presence

Rating: G

Summary: Written for the prompt 'Owen/Tosh, 5 times Tosh gave Owen flowers/candy/edible arrangements/etc and the 1 time Owen accepted the gift' on comment-fic.

[*]

The first time Tosh made the mistake was Owen's second day on the job.

He was hung over, which would have surprised her if she hadn't hacked his file the day before. She went out through the invisible lift to spare him the siren on the main door and brought back a tray of coffees, his with extra espresso.

When she offered it, he scowled at her through blood-shot eyes. "Wot's that for?"

"You look like you could use it," she said, smiling gently. Then she gasped when the tray was knocked out of her hands.

"I don't need your pity," he growled, and stormed off.

The second time was a basket of fruit carved up to look like flowers on Valentine's Day, which even Tosh acknowledged wasn't a good idea.

"I'm going to leave, and come back again," Owen declared to the Hub when he laid eyes on the arrangement, "and when I get back that _thing _had better be out of my area."

Tosh removed the basket, blushing horribly, while Suzie sniggered and Jack tried his absolute best not to.

A few months later Owen began complaining incessantly that he'd run out of snacks, mostly trying to annoy the new office boy. Partially out of a desire for peace, but mostly just to make Owen happy, Tosh went out and brought back a bag of his favorites from Tesco.

"Way to ruin my fun, Tosh," he'd said, giving her the acidic, patronizing smile that was his specialty. He slid the bag on the floor across the medical bay until it slammed into the waste paper basket.

When Diane disappeared, Tosh left a bouquet of flowers on his desk the next day, thinking he could make a memorial. She came back from a tech retrieval to find the bouquet stomped into the floor of the empty medical bay.

During the months that Jack was gone, Owen took on so many responsibilities. Sure, they shared the extra work, but the burden of leadership seemed to rest heavier on Owen's shoulders than any amount of paperwork. She bought some chocolate one night and brought it down to his desk in the medical bay.

He held out his hand, expecting more paperwork, and looked up in surprise when she placed the large candy bar in it instead.

"To help you stay awake," she said earnestly.

Owen gave her a searching look, accentuated by the dark circles under his eyes. "Thanks, Tosh," he said crisply. "But this isn't really my type."

She scurried away, pretending she hadn't seen the long-suffering look.

As soon as she places the candy cane down on the table, Tosh realized that this time is so much worse than those other mistakes. This is a huge faux pas, but she already given it to him and she can't take it back now, can she?

Owen stares at the candy cane. She would have brought something better, but she's been stuck in the Hub for hours trying to track down the latest alien to come through the Rift. The one Owen's not allowed to work on because Martha still hasn't cleared him for field duty. Because he's dead.

"I'm sorry, I…" she can't think of anything to say.

He rubs the thin plastic wrapper with his unfeeling fingers and doesn't reply.

"I can take that back, I'm sure Gwen would-"

"No, it's fine," he looks up suddenly, fingers wrapping around the hard candy. He clears his throat. "Um, thank you, Tosh."

She looks too surprised, it's just making the moment more awkward, so she tries to smile. "Any time," she nods.

Owen smiles wryly. "I know."


	4. Timing Isn't Everything

Title: Timing Isn't Everything

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Written for the prompt 'Torchwood, Jack/John, reunion in a bar: how it might have gone if John hadn't had an agenda' on comment-fic.

[*]

It went just like every time he'd reunited with John: hot, violent and with a high enough density of sins per minute to throw off Jack's score for the decade.

The first kiss was always blistering after they'd been apart for a while, and for Jack it had been a _very_ long time. Then there was the playground scrapping that didn't do any real harm, but always got their blood flowing, and the requisite groping and drinking and eye-fucking and _God_ it had been far too long since Jack had done this.

After all that, Jack told him to leave. As much as he'd love to continue, he needed to fix things with his team first. Not to mention, he was planning something with Ianto; he had a suave line about a date that he was planning to surprise the younger man with at an opportune moment.

The look of shock on John's face was bittersweet."Time was you couldn't have enough of me on your territory," John retorted, before shooting the glass out from in front of his team.

However much they might make it seem otherwise, the Time Agency did teach more than how to lay any species you came across. John read the situation quickly and disappeared using the teleport on his Vortex Manipulator, popping out of existence with a flash of blue light and a significant wink to Jack.

As he brushed aside the concerns of his team, Jack decided: he'd ask Ianto out tomorrow. Tonight, he had other plans.


	5. From Cardiff With Love

Title: From Cardiff With Love

Rating: G

Summary: Things to cut back on: Bond movies. Inhaling unidentified fumes. Written for the tw100 community.

[*]

Jack planned painful deaths for Owen as he crept silently toward the Tourist Office. The door was open and Jack slipped through cautiously.

In his dark suit, swiveling his chair slowly around and stroking a plushie Welsh dragon, Ianto was the image of a criminal mastermind. His shirt, stained green by the unidentified compound Owen had spilled and the manic gleam in his eyes were Jack's only warnings before the plushie was chucked at his head.

"No, Captain Jack, I expect you to die! Burn him Snuffly!"

Jack sighed as Ianto ran out the door cackling. Owen was so fired.


	6. Domestic Bliss

Title: Domestic Bliss

Rating: G

Summary: Written for the prompt 'Torchwood, Jack/Ianto, they buy curtains for Ianto's flat.' Written for comment-fic.

[*]

"Red is your color," Jack said threw his hands in the air.

"Red is only a step down from mauve! How many times have we had to bring aliens here, they'll spook if we choose red."

"Blue then, that's your favorite color," Jack growled.

"That doesn't go with the decor, Jack," the Welshman nearly snarled.

"Why not solid black," Jack suggested, keeping an extremely tenuous grip on his patience. "We end up sleeping during the day sometimes, that way they'd be useful."

Ianto stared at him in complete disbelief. "Are you being serious? Why would you possibly think that's a good idea?"

Gwen walked into the room just in time to stop the battle from coming to blows. "Alright boys, that's enough! The curtains should be green!"

The men stopped and stared. After a moment, Ianto cocked his head. "You know, that's not a bad idea. A nice forest green would set off the cream bordering."

"I was thinking sea-foam green, actually," Jack commented.

Ianto blinked. "Sea-foam? That would clash terribly!"

"Excuse me for wanting to add some color to the room-"

Gwen held off from smacking her own forehead and took a strategic retreat.


	7. Desperate Times

Title: Desperate Times

Rating: G

Summary: Once the paperwork's done, there's really nothing else to do.

Author's Note: For the prompt 'Torchwood, Gen, the team plays the longest game of Monopoly ever' on comment-fic. I may be slightly addicted to this community.

[*]

"I'll invest in... six hundred shares of the Millennium Center," Ianto said decisively, collecting a few slips of torn paper with STOCK scribbled messily across each side. "Your turn, Gwen."

Gwen accepted the dice as they were handed to her, but stared at the board with as much excitement as a child looking upon a particularly unappetizing dinner. "Which am I, again?"

"You were the paperclip with two bends, I think," Tosh pointed at Splott.

"No, she was the Zadian nickel," Jack gestured toward the jail corner.

"Does it even matter?" Owen moaned from the coach. They turned to look at him, and he glared back with hate-filled, blood-shot eyes. "Tosh, darling, when this time bubble thing of yours pops I'm going to kill you. And you, Teaboy, for not having anything in the Tourist Office besides Cardiff Monopoly. And Jack, for not havin' any decent alcohol in the Hub. And Gwen too, 'cause by then I'll probably have gone insane from having to listen to Monopoly divided into _stocks_." With that, he careened off the couch and down into the medical bay to check all their blood samples for increasingly improbable diseases.

"I'll go talk to him," Tosh excused herself.

"I'm going to try to call Rhys again," Gwen said miserably. "We can... pick this up later, I suppose." She eyed the game board with dread.

"How much alcohol did you actually have in here?" Ianto asked after a few moments.

Jack nearly smiled. "I'm putting it down to the time bubble that Owen's still alive."

Ianto nodded. Then he a gave a tiny smile. "Since they all left, I believe, technically, I've won Cardiff."

Jack just sighed.


	8. Evolution of the Bean

Title: The Evolution of the Bean

Rating: G

Summary: Jack's always been obsessed with coffee. Written for the prompt 'Torchwood, Jack, Finding a good cup of coffee throughout the 20th century' on comment-fic.

[*]

Jack's partner went through alcohol rehab five times, at his last count. The reason it didn't do any good wasn't that he was addicted- though he was- but that he was an aficionado. Alcohol, along with drugs, sex, murder and gems, were John's passions; he studied them and valued them as much as he partook in them.

Jack's vice was coffee.

On a small, backwater colony coffee was an unheard-of luxury. He'd been granted a sip once as a young child and had been blown away by the taste, the buzz, the wealth of it. When he'd become a Time Agent and the stuff was available every day, passed around like water, he knew he'd reached his dreams.

Bouncing through time, Jack tried all sorts of coffee, grown from beans, fruits, teased from animals, synthesized in labs and put through processes Jack didn't actually want to know. Coffee was his addiction, and his handlers were only grateful that his weak spot wasn't as dangerous as those of his partner.

The Tardis made the best coffee. Although the Doctor scoffed at his dismissal of tea, both he and Rose loved teasing Jack for the looks of bliss that appeared when he even smelled the Tardis' coffee aroma.

Coffee in the nineteenth century tasted like mud. Even once he got his head out of the bottle permanently, a good twenty years later and into the next century, it hadn't improved by much. The hangovers and drugs highs had cushioned (or worsened, it was difficult to tell) the withdrawal from decades of daily caffeine mainlining, but the urge to drink never really went away. He never gave up, trying a sip from this establishment and a sip from that one, but it was all so disgustingly below par that it wasn't until the mid-eighties when he could even stand to finish a cup.

There were a few places Jack found that could manage a decent brew- a café a half hour from the Hub, an assistant in Torchwood London (only got to drink that once, thanks to a homicidal blowfish), a corporal during the Great War. No one could quite make it up to par, but it was enough. At the turn of the twenty-first century, he'd mostly given up and drank instant every day, ignoring taste in favor of the caffeine to which he was still addicted, immortal or not.

Then he met Ianto Jones.

When he tasted Jones' coffee Jack knew two things. The first was that the young man was probably a spy from UNIT or a Time Agent from his missing years come to assassinate him. The second was that he didn't care, as long as he got that coffee. Still, it wouldn't look good to let him in without a fight.

As soon as he was hired, Jack introduced Jones to the thirty-fourth century coffee machine he'd repaired after it had fallen through the Rift in the fifties. After all that time it was just waiting for the right person to make it sing.

The twenty-first century was when it all changed. And now, Jack was ready.


	9. Cessation

Title: Cessation

Rating: PG

Summary: Gwen would have noticed she was dying if it weren't for the fact that she was, you know, dying. Written for the prompt 'Slow death' on comment-fic.

[*]

It wasn't just the headache. If it was, she would have noticed sooner. As interesting as it was to study the no-longer-late woman she'd replaced, Gwen wasn't actually unobservant enough to miss a hole being torn through the back of her was the slow, creeping sensation, almost like nausea, that lingered as much as she tried to concentrate. It was dark and settled thickly in her chest, making her heart beat faster with a primal, unrecognized fear. When Suzie began to talk about the afterlife was when Gwen recognized the was her death, relentlessly taking over.


	10. True Love, Torchwood Style

Title: True Love, Torchwood Style

Rating: Either G or XXXXX, take your pick

Summary: Ianto finds true love at last. Written for the prompt Ianto &/ Myfanwy, cuddling with a dinosaur' on comment-fic.

[*]

It was hard to explain to everyone but Jack. The other just didn't seem to understand that with the psychic bond, Ianto was able to communicate fully with Myfanwy and that they had fallen in love. Owen called him sick, Tosh simply refused to talk about it, and Gwen had asked for Retcon that first night and since then had accepted Owen's absolutely serious warning of 'You don't want to know.'

"I know that they don't understand," Ianto told his love one night as they cuddled in their nest. "But you'd think they'd be a bit more open-minded. Jack has more of a right than they have to be angry, and he's taking it pretty well."

Jack was unhappy that his and Ianto's relationship had ended, but he understood that Myfanwy's species mated for life. He had thrown his support behind the happy couple and, despite the awkward silences whenever the relationship was brought up, the others could not speak against his decree.

"The only downside," Ianto mused, rubbing Myfanwy's wing comfortingly at her unhappy coo, "not that I'm not glad this happened. But there's no way I can introduce you to my sister."

Myfanwy nodded her beak drowsily, then began to snore. Ianto tucked her wing under his head and fell asleep.


	11. How Ianto's Cocoa Saved Christmas

Title: How Ianto's Cocoa Saved Christmas

Rating: G

Warning: If you have a fear of hot chocolate, don't read this

Summary: The team is trapped inside the base on Christmas- and it just got worse. Written for the advent challenge on lj.

[*]

"This must be the worst thing that could possibly happen on Christmas," Gwen moans into her hands. She is seated with Jack, Tosh and Owen in the middle of the Hub, which is in the near-darkness of lock-down around them.

"It could be worse," Toshiko spoke up, attempting to be cheerful. "At least we have Ianto's coffee."

"Um, sorry, the coffee maker's broken," Ianto announces from the kitchenette.

A four-person moan resonates through the Hub.

"But I've got hot chocolate!"

"Great, that really makes up for bein' trapped in here," Owen grumbles.

"You've never had Ianto's hot chocolate," Jack rubs his hands together gleefully. The others perk up, curiosity piqued, and they all accept steaming mugs off a tray.

Ianto smirks as exclamations and satisfied noises begin to permeate the air, along with the whiff of good, strong cocoa. He sits with his teammates and explains that the recipe is from his mother's side of the family, there were no drugs nor alien technology utilized in its brewing, and yes, he would get them all refills.

As the sounds of good cheer take over the Hub, Ianto decides that this was the best thing that could have happened on Christmas.


	12. Craving

Title: Craving

Rating: G

Summary: _Nobody_ touched Ianto's desserts. She was only going to look… Written for tw100 and fanfic-bakeoff, even if I was a day late.

[*]

That little crack was teasing her, the last slice of honey cake barely visible. Gwen gazed longingly toward the cupboard, twitching from her craving.

It was completely against the rules. _Nobody_ touched Ianto's desserts. She was only going to look…

Her finger was a hair away from the sweet icing when she was tugged away and the cupboard door slammed. She spun around to meet icy blue eyes.

"I'm sorry Ianto!" she cried. "It's just _so _sugary!"

Ianto's gaze softened. "I understand," he said. From a suit pocket he withdrew a large Cadbury bar. "Truce?"

They indulged happily ever after.


	13. The Opposite of a Train Crash

Title: The Opposite of a Train Crash

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Years of sexual tension have led up to this… Written for the prompt 'I have to go too. I um... I left my apartment on fire' on comment-fic.

[*]

They knew it would happen. They just didn't think it would happen… quite like this.

Something crashed in the medical bay and there was a high-pitched cry. Ianto, Jack and Gwen emerged from three different directions, hands unclipping holsters and removing guns before they arrived on the main platform. A moment's coordination from Jack had him and Gwen stepping forward to aim their weapons into the bay, while Ianto held back.

"Oh, God!" Gwen blurted, but the couple below didn't seem to hear. Tosh's blouse was already on the floor along with what looked like half of Owen's medical supplies. Her hands were wrapped around the medic's head, stopping it from moving more than a scant distance away from her mouth while Owen wrestled with the clip to her bra.

"I'm taking the day off, Jack," Gwen said firmly, holstering her weapon and striding away.

Ianto moved forward, took one look at Tosh and Owen and paled dramatically. "I have to go too. I, um… I left my apartment on fire."

Jack laughed and caught his elbow before he could leave. "Come on, aren't you happy for them?"

Color was returning to Ianto's cheeks dramatically. "Very happy, sir. All the same, I'd prefer not to see it."

"Spoilsport!" Jack called after him. He snuck another peek into the bay, where things were progressing rather quickly. This time, however, the company was noticed.

"Piss off, Harkness!"


	14. Christmas Surprise

Title: Christmas Surprise

Rating: PG

Summary: A scary misunderstanding turns into a happy surprise. Written for adventchallenge.

[*]

The first few seconds after he entered the Hub to the sight of Jack spraying a tall dark figure with pterodactyl spray, Ianto found himself unable to breath. After a moment, details broke through. Tosh, Owen and Gwen were laughing cheerfully, and Jack had rarely looked more enthusiastic and happy. Lastly, the dark figure was unmoving and appeared to be... made of chocolate?

"You're just in time!" Jack called, eyes bright as he beckoned Ianto over. Slowly, Ianto circled the figure and laughed aloud to find a giant, dark chocolate Santa Claus.

"Merry Christmas, Myfanwy!" they all shouted as one.


	15. The Secret Santas

Title: The Secret Santas

Rating: G

Summary: Ianto's Christmas has been terrible for a week in advance. Could the very source of his displeasure bring about happiness? Written to avoid my homework.

[*]

Ianto blinked heavily. His eyes crossed for a moment before they refocused on the pile of paperwork in front of him. He was almost done with this packet- he'd promised himself that he would leave the rest for tomorrow morning after he finished this one.

He finished the page and picked up the packet to put it in the complete pile, but to his dismay he realized that there was a whole other page, filled with questions to answer and lines to initial. Ianto rubbed his hand over his face, and at that moment, another burst of laughter sounded from downstairs.

He sighed. Jack had told him very seriously that this work needed to be completed before 9 am tomorrow so that UNIT could prepare for the usual invasion of London. Christmas Day was tomorrow, but, as usual, Jack had left it until the last minute. So while the team was drinking beer and whispering in the main Hub, Ianto was stuck doing paperwork in the back of the conference room.

Maybe he could go downstairs, could sit down with them and drink and laugh… or maybe the moment he appeared they'd stop their secretive whispers and smile widely at him, just as they had all week. Ianto didn't know what they were keeping from him, but whatever it was it was making the whole team exchange mischievous grins with each other when they thought he couldn't see. He was a bit annoyed that they didn't think he would notice, but mostly he just felt excluded. He hadn't been able to have a real conversation without feeling alone for days, so he'd mostly focused on filing and bugging the team to complete their backlogs of reports.

He shook his head and reapplied himself to the pile of paperwork. Maybe if he finished all of it early, he could convince Jack to give him Christmas morning on-call instead of at work and he could visit Rhiannon and her children. He hadn't seen them since David's birthday in September.

A half hour later, Jack appeared in the doorway just as Ianto cracked a gigantic yawn. "Looks like you could use a break," the captain commented, leaning against the door comfortably.

Ianto tried, he tried his very hardest, not to glare. "If I'd been given more time to compile the information, I wouldn't have to work on it for three hours straight."

Jack shrugged, completely ignoring Ianto's anger. "Come downstairs."

"Jack, I have to finish-"

"Just come downstairs."

Ianto rolled his eyes, but stood up, stretching his sore muscles as he did so. As soon as he stepped out of the conference room, however, he forgot all about the hours he'd spent in the chair.

"What did you…"

The Hub was sparkling. The floors were entirely free of grime and dirt, the metal of the railings, the Rift Manipulator and the workstations shined, everything was clear of clutter and trash. Tosh, Owen and Gwen's desks were completely organized, as was Jack's- more importantly, he could _see_ Jack's desk through the squeaky-clean glass partitions of the office.

Jack was grinning. "That's not all." He took a stunned Ianto's arm and led him downstairs.

When the reached Ianto's small office at the entrance to the archives, the others were waiting. Tosh and Gwen looked at him with excitement and anticipation, while Owen just smirked with satisfaction.

The entire desk was piled with what must have been thousands of pages of paperwork. Ianto's blood ran cold. He approached his desk with fingers that shook from shock and fear. When he examined a single form from the top of one pile, his heart dropped from his throat back to his chest with a heavy thud. The pages weren't work to be completed, but entirely finished reports and fully organized files.

"It's everything you've been telling us to finish, all the backed-up paperwork that UNIT and the Ministry of Defense have been asking for, along with the field reports, inter-agency communications, technology upgrades and Owen's autopsy records." Jack put his hands on his hips proudly. "What do you think?"

Ianto tried to speak, but nothing came out. He couldn't really feel his face, but he was pretty sure that if he looked in a mirror he would find it stuck in an embarrassing expression of complete astonishment.

"Happy Christmas, Ianto," Gwen summed up, teeth glinting in the fluorescent lights of his office.

"Thank you," he managed after a seconds of heavy swallowing. His heart had risen back into his throat, and, though he would fervently deny it, his eyes were burning a little. "I can't even… why did you-"

"Because you always do above and beyond your duties for us," Tosh answered. "It's really the least we can do to make your job easier."

"And to thank you for covering our shifts when we were sick, Owen and I are covering for you for tomorrow," Gwen continued. Owen nodded along.

Jack announced that he had champagne in the mini-fridge, and they all ended up in the main Hub, drinking the bubbly and laughing about their holiday plans. Jack admitted that the UNIT paperwork was just to keep him out of the way and that he would finish it himself. Ianto mentioned his plans to visit his sister's family, and Jack gave him a nod and a smile that made the future seem bright.

Ianto couldn't imagine a better Christmas, and there was nowhere else he'd rather be.


	16. To the Rescue!

Title: To the Rescue!

Rating: G

Summary: For the prompt 'Jack/Ianto, He really doesn't mind being Jack's 'damsel in distress.' Really.' on comment-fic. I think this is a bit crackier than the prompter originally intended. It's definitely crackier and more OOC that _I_ originally intended.

Author's Note: I'm really sorry about this, honestly.

[*]

For the record, Ianto has been captured before. There was that time in the Beacons, the time when he was wearing a white suit after losing Jack's bet and the Simularians thought he was a god, and that incident with the hallucinogenic coffee that he refuses to acknowledge. So this isn't exactly a new situation for him.

In fact, this kidnapping was rather mild. Instead of being nearly eaten, being stripped and painted gold, or imagining that Santa Claus had come to tear his eyes out, he's been left in a cell for three peaceful hours. Admittedly it's not a very nice cell, rather squashed and damp, but he's planned half of his escape already when Jack bursts in.

"Ianto! Are you hurt? What did they do to you?"

Ianto's barely had time to blink when Jack starts shaking him by the shoulders. "I'm fine, Jack, reall-"

"We've got to get you out of here. Don't move, I've got you." Before he can protest, Jack picks him up and begins running down the corridor of the invaders' underground hideout.

He is honestly impressed by the feat of strength. He'd be more impressed if he didn't have to witness it from this position.

"Jack, put me down! Jack, I can walk!"

Jack turns off the corridor and finally puts Ianto down, then immediately crushes Ianto to his chest. "I thought we'd never find you, Ianto!" he says roughly into Ianto's neck.

Stuck staring at the ceiling, Ianto can only awkwardly pat his boss and lover on the back. "Did you use the tracker in my cell phone?"

"The… tracker?"

Ianto rolls his eyes at the wall behind him. Then he tries to move his neck so it's in a normal direction again. "The one we installed two months ago in case something like this happened."

"Oh," Jack lets go of him at last. "No, I went to where your car was last seen and interviewed people in the vicinity until I got a description of the van they took you in. Then I got tracked it down and snuck in here to find you."

Ianto holds off from face-palming. It's a close thing. "Why didn't you ask Tosh for help?"

Jack scowls. "I rescued you _myself_, Ianto. I don't need any help."

"And how are you planning on getting us out of here?" Ianto asks, gritting his teeth.

Jack narrows his eyes. "I'll think of something. I'm great at improvising. But I don't have to tell you that, do I?" He winks.

Ianto takes a deep breath, then lets it out slowly. Then he takes another deep breath and lets that one out slowly too. "Give me your earbud. Tosh can pull up blueprints and CCTV and have us out in no time."

Jack laughs. "Ianto, Ianto. That would be cheating. I'm going to get us out of here, don't you worry."

Ianto resists the urge to reach for Jack's gun as he is dragged into the corridor at full pelt.


	17. First Hurdle

Title: First Hurdle

Rating: G

Summary: Jack ponders Gwen after her first day. Written for tw100 and fanfic-bakeoff

[*]

Jack watched through the glass of his office as Gwen joked with Owen and Tosh, relaxing after the disaster of Gwen's first case. She'd felt so guilty, even though her only mistake was joking in the wrong place at the wrong time.

She'd been a PC, but the sight of those bodies had scared her. Jack knew that for a Torchwood agent, she was green as a child. They were lucky that the body count wasn't higher this time, and he had to look away after she laughed, so carefree and bright. He wondered how long that youth would last.


	18. Parting

Title: Parting

Rating: G

Summary: AU moment of Captain Jack Harkness.

[*]

Jack broke off the kiss, the first and last he'd ever have with this man, and looked him in the eyes a final time before turning to the light.

His hand was caught, and he looked back at the lost expression on his namesake's face. "Will I ever see you again?"

Jack thought about surprise attacks, fiery crashes, and then about the loneliness that had radiated from this man all night. He blamed the tears in his eyes on the brightness behind him as he answered, "I don't think so."

He left then, because it was the only option. The moment the ghost of a saluting hero faded to nothing, he turned and walked away.


	19. Boiling Over

Title: Boiling Over

Rating: G

Summary: Ianto is stressing about an important dinner. Written for the tw100 prompt 'Cookbooks.'

[*]

When Jack arrived home, instead of the expected quiet afternoon off, he found an anxious Ianto in the kitchen with a cookbook in each hand.

"I don't know how to get this all done by tonight," Ianto moaned. "Why did I volunteer to home-cook?"

Jack stopped him with firm hands on his shoulders. "Stop worrying. I'll help you cook."

Ianto's whole body relaxed. "Would you? I just... I want this to be perfect."

"Your sister will love me," Jack soothed. "How could she not?"

Ianto rolled his eyes. "Thank you. Now be quiet and fetch the pasta."


	20. Millennium Days

Title: Millennium Days

Rating: G

Summary: Why Torchwood is clearly a soap opera. Written for the prompt 'Serial drama' on comment-fic.

[*]

As the door to Jack's office closed loudly- not enough to be called a slam, not this time- Tosh, Ianto and Owen converged in the Medical bay where, if one was quiet enough, snippets of the conversation above could be overheard.

"What's she on about this time?" Owen questioned, spinning in his chair. He tossed something to Tosh, who caught it with both hands, then began turning it over.

"The police are having trouble locating a serial killer," Tosh said distractedly, attention caught by the object. "She wants… where did you get this?"

"She wants to use Torchwood resources to apprehend him," Ianto finished.

"I dunno, it's been on my desk for a few weeks. But if we help them once they'll start expecting it and we'll never get anything done," Owen multi-tasked.

"It could have been dangerous!"

"That's a good point," Ianto agreed, "and it would probably convince her faster than 'it's not our problem.'"

Owen rolled his eyes. "Is that what Jack said? God, and we wonder why she's in a snit every other week."

"More like every few days," Tosh muttered.

At that moment Jack's office opened and Gwen stormed out. The three in the Medical bay went unnoticed as she grabbed her purse and left the Hub, Jack glaring at her back. Once the cog door had closed behind her, he glanced suspiciously into the Med bay. "What are you doing down there? Not plotting anything, I hope."

"Just looking at this," Tosh said, holding up Owen's object after a momentary hesitation and look-throwing among the group. "Owen left it on his desk, unidentified."

Jack glared at the medic. "It's not dangerous, is it?""I don't think so," Tosh answered dutifully.

Jack gave them all a last look and went back into his office, closing the door behind him.

"Thanks for stabbing me in the back!" Owen protested as soon as their leader was out of earshot. "This place is becoming a regular soap opera!"

"Back-stabbing, a prevalence of easily avoidable arguments, love triangles, lots of violence," Tosh mused aloud.

"At least none of us are related," Owen said, eyebrows raised.

Ianto coughed quietly and looked away.

"What?" the medic asked, eyes widening. Ianto started climbing the stairs out of the Med bay. "Ianto? Ianto!"


	21. White Wedding

Title: White Wedding

Rating: G

Summary: First comes love, then comes…

[*]

Ianto stands at the alter, back straight, hands clasped formally behind him. The rose in his lapel is a beautiful velvety red, and it matches those tucked and pinned all throughout the church. Gwen decorated; Tosh installed extra security, just in case.

Swirling around the roses, accentuating and illuminating, are crisp swathes of creamy, smooth fabric, with enough yellow to light the room and enough white to make Ianto feel like he's floating amongst the clouds. The feeling could be unrelated, however. The smile on his face, those gracing the faces of a dozen friends in the pews, are not caused by the decorating, as radiant as it may be.

The organ music crests as the doors at the opposite end of the hall swing open and Jack saunters in. His dark-as-night suit is nothing like a white wedding gown, and the length and speed of his strides bring him to Ianto long before the music catches up. Tosh takes her time walking up the aisle, grinning ironically, but Ianto's view of her is impeded by a kiss from Jack that after all this time still leaves his knees weak.

Hands fitted seamlessly together, they turn to face the minister. His words fade gently into the background, though, as Ianto focuses on the warm flesh on his palm, the heat of the church, the cotton texture of the pillow beneath his head…

His eyelids flutter and open, and he has a few content, joy-filled moments before he realizes where he is: his own flat, his bed. His empty bed.

The bedside clock declares half four. Ianto can hear the soft clicking of Jack's laptop from the living room. He smiles softly and rolls into the warm spot Jack left behind. As he closes his eyes again, he begins to nudge his unconscious mind in the direction of a honeymoon…


	22. Hiring Policy

Title: Hiring Policy

Rating: G

Summary: Jack always picked up strays. Written for the tw100 prompt 'Strays.'

[*]

Jack always picked up strays: people with no outside attachments, people who could survive the vivid isolation that was required at Torchwood.

Toshiko had no other options besides Torchwood. Owen needed something at which to focus his grief and rage at the universe. Ianto was unable to see any other path.

Gwen forced her way in, vivacious and strong and hopelessly naive. She had friends, family, a boyfriend, and demanded a place at Torchwood as well.

For all of her untouchable innocence, her inability to acknowledge the true darknesses in life, Jack guessed she'd last the longest of them all.


	23. Reconstruction

Title: Reconstruction

Rating: G

Summary: After the Beacons, Ianto could use a little TLC. Written for the tw100 prompt 'Sticks and Stones.'

[*]

_sticks and stones can break my bones…_

Tosh started sobbing when she saw the pictures of vanished travelers from before they went to the Beacons. Owen had already 'driven Gwen home,' so Jack asked Ianto to unload the Range Rover while he talked to her. When Ianto brought tea around a while later, the two were murmuring softly, heads close together.

Jack nodded as he took the mug, a thanks and a dismissal. "You can get yourself home, right Ianto?" he said, barely looking away from Tosh.

Ianto nodded, unnoticed, and limped away.

…_but your words will always hurt me_


	24. Taking a Night Off

Title: Taking a Night Off  
>Rating: G<br>Summary: Jack tries something new, with mixed results. Written for the tw100 challenge 'Evening.'

[*]

Jack arrived at Ianto's flat at 6:12, just as dinner finished cooking. By seven they had finished eating and had drunk half a bottle of wine, trying to focus on non-Torchwood topics of conversation.

Jack looked to his watch three times, his mobile four.

They chose a movie and curled up on the couch. The movie was quite entertaining.

Jack left his holster within easy reach and his body remained tense for the whole film.

As the credits rolled, he sighed. "I'm sorry. I don't think I'm cut out for 'evenings in.'"

"We'll try again," Ianto promised with a smile.


	25. Sleeper

Title: Sleeper  
>Rating: PG<br>Summary: "My loyalty is to her!" wasn't entirely accurate. Written for the tw100 prompt' Sleeper.'

[*]

Ianto watched Jack drive off as he pulled out his mobile. The call picked up in two rings.

"Report?"

"I'm still alive," Ianto said cynically.

An icy silence.

"He should have killed me. How did you know he wouldn't?"

"The captain and I are well acquainted. I know he would never kill someone for love."

"Should I act now, sir?"

"Not yet. They'll think they know everything about you now; they'll trust you more than ever. Wait for my command."

"Yes, Master."

Ianto went inside and filled a garbage bag with his clothes, all thoroughly stained with the Cyberwoman's blood.


	26. How to Tell a True Love Story

Title: How to Tell a True Love Story

Rating: G

Summary: Teeth must _always _be brushed before getting into bed.

[*]

Ianto was rudely awoken by a cold rush of air behind him and twin groans from his mattress and Jack as the latter climbed into the former. He turned over and snuggled up to Jack, who, despite having come from outside the covers, was warmer than Ianto.

"Oh, you will not believe the night I've had," Jack sighed, shifting until his muscles began to relax. He crossed the few inches between them and gave Ianto a tired, messy kiss.

Ianto pushed him back, suddenly more awake. "Jack!" he said in an outraged tone. "Have you brushed your teeth?"

Jack let his head fall into Ianto's neck. "I'm exhausted, Ianto. I had to chase a posse of Urgathur gangsters through the streets of Cardiff. Imagine an American western, but with laser weapons instead of six-shooters. One of them even tried to come on to me!"

Ianto gave a strange smile of amusement. "And this is a problem because…"

"Never, not in a million years, would I do an Urgathur," Jack practically whined. He let out a jaw-cracking yawn, then began kissing Ianto's neck very softly. "Couldn't you waive the tooth-brushing rule just this once?"

Ianto wrestled internally for a long moment. Then his breath caught as Jack's lips brushed below the corner of his jaw. "Fine," he said grudgingly, "just this once."

Jack stopped kissing him and stared at his face, as thought he could make out any details in Ianto's dark bedroom. "Really? I didn't think that would work." Then he blinked- "I mean, thank you very much!" - and proceeded to nestle around Ianto as though the younger man were a teddy bear.

Ianto could only shake his head at his own weakness and at a punch-drunk Jack. He put his arms around Jack and settled back down to sleep.

"You must really love me," Jack murmured. His drowsy voice sounded like he was smiling, although, in the darkness, Ianto couldn't tell.

"I guess I must," Ianto said at the same volume, but from the gentle snoring in his arms he knew that Jack had already slipped away.


	27. On the Fifth Day of Christmas

Jack entered the kitchen silently. "What's that?"

Ianto spun around, clutching what looked like a thin cardboard box to his chest. Jack peered at the lettering and the box disappeared behind Ianto's back.

"You know I'll find out eventually," Jack warned with a sly grin.

Ianto weighed his options, and gave in. "It's an advent calendar," he said, reluctantly exposing the front of the box. Besides 25 dotted-line squares, the box sported a collection of teddy bears in a sleigh. "It's a uh, family tradition," Ianto mumbled, cheeks heating up.

"Why would you hide that?" Jack stepped closer.

"It's silly, and childlike-"

"And tradition," Jack interrupted. Deftly, he reached out and popped open the fifth square, then scooped out the chocolate within. For the second time that evening, he squinted at something nearly incomprehensible.

"It's a reindeer, I think."

Jack's expression cleared. "I see. I kind of. So what, do we split it?"

"Uh… Each person has their own calendar," Ianto said uncertainly.

"Then where's mine?"

"I- um…"

Jack crossed his arms. "You didn't get me one?" he teased. "Why Ianto, I can't believe you didn't-"

From the same cupboard where he'd hidden his advent calendar, Ianto slipped out another, and Jack was silenced. Ianto's eyes jumped to and away from Jack. "I didn't think you'd…" He held out the box.

Jack took it solemnly, but his eyes shone. "I've got some catching up to do."

Pleasure lit Ianto's face, and he gave Jack a small smile. "I'll wait."


	28. Awaiting the Coming

Jack let the team have Christmas off. He didn't observe it- he'd learned that an immortal could never have a happy holiday surrounded by loved ones- but that didn't mean that his friends couldn't.

Knowing they were happily celebrating with their families somehow didn't make Jack feel less lonely.

He sighed, swirling his tumbler of scotch. Maybe in the new year the Doctor would show up, and he could be normal again, happy again.

A light cough at the door attracted Jack's attention to a suited figure. He smiled and waved Ianto in; maybe he would celebrate tonight after all.


	29. After Your Eggs Have Hatched

Frustrated with his team's ceaseless complaining, Jack left the conference room to await the arrival of the pizza somewhere more peaceful. It wasn't his fault the Rift had been flaring all day, but his grumpy employees didn't seem to understand. Luckily, Ianto appeared in the main entrance just a minute later.

Hoping to precipitate more complaining, Jack apologized. "I know you wanted to be with your family today, but I had no control-"

Ianto gave Jack a light kiss. "I'm content with the way things turned out."

They smiled at each other until cries for food rang through the Hub.


End file.
